Last night a member of my family died, Molly. She took her last breath last night while I held her. Molly was 17 years old and was much more than a pet. She was an integral part of my family. Molly has been there with me through the ups and downs of life. I feel guilty, sad, and ashamed. I should’ve I gotten her help sooner. What I thought was a byproduct of old age was disease just moving in slowly. She fought until the bitter end to stay with me but finally she couldn’t hang on.
Molly was funny, intelligent, and loyal. The pandemic brought me closer to her than ever. She was my “rubber duck” and work companion. I talked ideas through with her and she would let me know if I have worked too hard. Literally, she slapped me on the head a few times to let me know to take a break. We ate lunch together and she loved turkey, eggs, pizza, Taco Bell, ice cream, chicken, steak, and the list goes on and one. She loved the color red and one of her favorite toys was a red Santa Clause that she used to sleep with. I used to call her my little horse because in her youth she would run up the stairs for bedtime and she sounded like a team of horses as she ran up the stairs in my row home that I used to have. She has slept with me for the last 15 years in my bed. For the last few years, I would stretch my hand out and she would put her paw or chin on top of it and we would fall asleep together like that most nights.
I didn’t know that 15 years ago when I picked her up that she would change my life forever. Molly has made me a better human being and has taught me more about life than any other human being has ever done. She taught me compassion, love, and selflessness. I suspect that I will be still learning from her for the years to come.
Wherever she is, Molly has made it a better place. I will never forget Molly and I always love her. I hope one day she will forgive me for the choices that I have made and I can see her again.