It is not merely a decision or a choice to open our hearts to another pet. It is indeed an act of courage as the torment we endured permeated through every aspect of our lives, leaving us feeling depleted, broken and alone. We were forced to face the brutal day without our beloved companions and so we found ourselves going through the motions without really being present at all.
My beloved bunny, Winkle, passed away on November 15 2019 at 9:30 a.m. and in that moment and in every breath that followed, I felt an intense emptiness which I had never before experienced. His departure stripped me of every routine, every bit of the life I held so dear. My mind replayed cherished memories including his happily munching on dandelion greens then flipping over to his side lying pose, content that all was well in his world, therefore all was well in mine. How could I go on?
Even months later, I stood crying in my darkness, the void still so great that I knew the only way to survive was to fill my heart again. However feelings of betrayal and guilt surfaced at the thought of bringing someone else home. Would Winkle understand?
But in the days, weeks and even months after his passing, I saw rainbows in odd places including in my car, dining room and bathroom. Although they were possibly just a result of reflections from the light, mirrors and windows, I was sure it was a sign that Winkle had made it safely to the Rainbow Bridge which gave me the strength to return to the shelter where he and I first met. But as I stood in the bunny room facing the impossible task of who to choose, I saw Widget side lying in his cage then clanging his metal bowl demanding to be noticed as if to say “I’m ready to go!” And so we did, and my heart lit up once again.